Age and sexual reawakening in modern life
The notion of individuals in their sixties or seventies engaging in a sexual life often elicits surprise or discomfort among younger generations, according to Tessa Peake-Jones. However, she believes there is no reason for such pursuits to cease if individuals wish them to continue, reports BritPanorama.
The 68-year-old actress, noted primarily for her role as Raquel in Only Fools and Horses, acknowledges the challenges of engaging with the dating scene as one ages. “The problem is that as you get older, you have less confidence about getting yourself out there, and so much of that stuff is now done online, which is more challenging if you’re not a digital native,” she observes. This hesitancy among older individuals grappling with online interactions often contrasts with a burgeoning spirit of “what have I got to lose?”
Peake-Jones portrays the character Lynn in a new production of Invisible Me at London’s Southwark Playhouse. The play, written by Bren Gosling, follows three working-class Londoners navigating the complexities of dating in their sixties. Lynn is characterized as feeling invisible, remarking that her sex life expired in 1987. However, a serendipitous meeting with a generous hotel guest prompts her to rediscover her sexuality, leading her to online dating and a mix of empowerment and harsh rejection.
Alongside Lynn, the stories of Jack, a widowed and HIV-positive gay man, and Alec, a straight divorced man, unfold as they navigate their own lonely existences. Despite living in proximity, the characters only converge towards the end of the play, highlighting themes of isolation and reconnection.
Peake-Jones reflects on societal isolation, stating, “We’re more and more isolated these days, all staring down at our screens.” She encourages a return to engagement, emphasizing the importance of looking up and making connections if one desires.
In a telephone conversation, Peake-Jones maintains a warm tone, reminiscent of her maternal roles on television. She gained recognition as Mrs. Maguire in the successful ITV series Grantchester from 2014 to 2024 and first became a household name as Del Boy’s partner Raquel in Only Fools and Horses.
The sitcom remains a staple of British comedy, with its 1996 Christmas special attracting 24.3 million viewers. Peake-Jones notes the enduring popularity of the series, with new generations discovering it. She attributes its longevity to the heartfelt writing of John Sullivan, contrasting it with contemporary comedy that often leans towards cruelty.
She also highlights Raquel’s strength as a character who stood her ground against male dominance, noting that the intention was to create a dynamic equal to Del Boy. “They wanted to write an equal for Del Boy. A woman who stood up to him,” she affirms.
Peake-Jones, a member of the growing demographic of “silver splitters,” divorced actor-director Douglas Hodge in 2013 after nearly three decades of marriage. This trend of couples parting ways after decades has risen significantly in recent years, reflecting broader societal shifts in marriage and living arrangements.
Despite acknowledging fears of loneliness, she insists that solitude can lead to self-discovery. Embracing a “f**k it” spirit, she argues that this is a time when individuals often remember aspects of themselves they thought lost or, alternatively, find new interests.
Looking forward, Peake-Jones discusses her upbringing, emphasizing her unique experience as a child of a bipolar mother and an absent father. Raised primarily by her mother and aunt, she credits them for instilling a profound sense of self in her youth. She reflects on her complex relationship with her mother, who, despite her struggles, supported her ambitions.
Currently, Peake-Jones is working on a book about her experiences and her mother’s influence. She expresses gratitude for the unwavering love and support her mother provided despite the challenges they faced, which she believes is crucial for fostering confidence in children.
Peake-Jones recalls the timing of her casting in Grantchester shortly before her mother’s passing, viewing it as a poignant farewell. The conclusion of the show similarly felt significant, as she describes the cast’s camaraderie and familial bond.
Reflecting on her career and life, Peake-Jones emphasizes a newfound openness to the future, advocating for others to re-engage with the world. “Just GET OUT THERE,” she advises. “It doesn’t have to be dating, necessarily. But look up, leave the house, be curious.”
Invisible Me is at the Southwark Playhouse, London, until 2 May (southwarkplayhouse.co.uk)
